Clear Head/Foggy Head

Some days, I experience a heightened sense of clarity and confidence, accompanied by feelings of contentment and purpose. Conversely, there are days, such as today, where I find myself in a state of profound disorientation. I wonder if others share this struggle—a sentiment where what seemed unequivocally clear yesterday is now shrouded in uncertainty and obscurity. Hormones, perhaps, play a role, but during moments of pervasive bewilderment like today, I discern a deeper, more intrinsic cause.

The root cause is that I am forgetting to spend time with the Lord and remember that He is holding me and has me exactly where He wants me. I don't need to rush ahead and pave my path forward. He will make it clear in His perfect timing. My lack of clarity is an attempt for me to wrestle the reins away from God and into my own hands.

He is molding me here in the waiting. When it’s foggy, I just need to turn to Him and find perfect peace and rest there. Some things don’t make much sense right now and that’s ok. He has a plan and if I could figure out all the details, why bother trusting God?

It is much better to trust that God has ways that are so much higher and unimaginable to us. He doesn't think like I do. His solutions look nothing like mine and thank goodness for that.

So today, and inevitably on another couple of days this week when things get foggy, I am choosing to rest and to trust. I am choosing to be gentle with myself instead of harshly calling myself lazy and bipolar. Ahhh…the struggle to be kind to myself is real! But it is getting better, and I am thankful for the ability to write because it truly reminds me of what is important.